Jul 08, 2021khill11 rated this title 5 out of 5 stars
"Now, more than ever, I wished desperately for a way to transfer pain, wished I could prove to my mother just how much I loved her, that I could just crawl into her hospital cot and press my body close enough to absorb her burden. It seemed only fair that life should present such an opportunity to prove one's filian piety. That the months my mother had been a vessel for me, her organs shifting and cramping together to make room for my existence, and the agony she'd endured upon my exit could be repaid by carrying this pain in her place."~pg.86
This book cracked something open in me I didn't realize I had been holding in. An ode to grief, love, mothers and the power of food memory.
Zauner was in her mid twenties, building her music career when her mother was diagnosed with cancer. Dropping everything, she goes home to be with her. Most of the story focuses on her mothers battle with cancer but Zauner also shares what it was like growing up Asian American, struggling with her Korean identity and the vividness of food memories.
How do you review someone else's grief? An incredibly heavy and heartbreaking read and yet a lot of beauty too. I read it in a day. Zauner doesn't hold back as she goes through the motions of retracing her mother's death and the months leading up to it. She looks back on their relationship, on their differences and how they bonded over food and the memories she will cherish. And how cooking offered her a way to channel her grief and keep her mother and their culture close after her passing. Zauner captures the helplessness and heartbreak of watching someone you love die of cancer in such an honest way that if you've been through it you know, and if you haven't you hope you never do. The way she wrote this, the trajectory of her story was so well carried through. The end really hit hard. A great debut, emotional and therapeutic. Highly reccomend, especially for all you memoir lovers. Please seek own voices reviews for this lovely book.
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